Scrrritttchh!

Imagine the sound of a needle on vinyl. I know this might be hard for anyone under forty, but hopefully you’ll get the drift.

I’ve been doing it again. And the stress has been building as a result. I realized it yesterday as I thought, “How can I feel so overwhelmed when I’m doing LESS than before?”

Different Kinds of LESS

It’s true, I’m doing less. I no longer teach community education classes, my elderly father is gone so I don’t have him as a responsibility any longer. I’m unschooling the tween, which means she usually tells me what she will be studying for the day, and until recently, it had been winter, so no outside gardening duties.

I’m doing less, so why does it feel overwhelming?

Not Learning, Not Writing Side Projects

Over six months ago, I signed up for Mark Dawson’s Ads for Authors. And because I didn’t have the $700 up front, I agreed to $75 payments over the course of twelve months. It’s a series of video courses, designed to be watched and implemented over the period of a few months. So far, the course has restarted at least twice since I signed up. I have watched only a few videos.

What do these videos teach me? Well, hopefully how to truly understand what the hell I’m doing with Amazon ads, Facebook ads, and more. And considering that my advertising on AMS has been averaging anywhere from 27% (that was really good) to 129% (yup, that means I’m operating in the negative) of my sales income, I really need to be doing better.

I Want it Right Now

I realized that I’m creating a nasty little trap for myself. I want to quit cleanings so bad that I’ve found myself in the “write more, more, MORE” loop.

It needs to be the “write smart” loop.

Write smart, work smart, and what I have in print RIGHT NOW could very possibly make all the difference in the world. And even if it doesn’t, with the education I will have the foundation I need to make the next book, or the next one after that, the success I need it to be to get what I want.

I found myself saying the same thing, “If I just write enough books…”

In the Indie world, there is certainly the mass production model. Crank out enough books over a short amount of time and you might very well make the dollars you need to succeed. There is also the learned model – one based on understanding ads, how they work, and using them and other devices (subscriber lists, online presence, book funnels, and more) to bring in readers and fans.

And I realized that I’ve tried to have a foot in each pool, without the learning that goes with it.

So…Scrrritttchh!

This is a record player (for all of you millennials who may have seen the arcane construction and wondered why the hell us old folks have it around still)

Priorities in order:

  • Finish Better Choices
  • Write enough short fiction to last me through the end of this year (8 stories, doled out on a one story a month basis)
  • Go through Mark Dawson’s course from beginning to end
  • Finish Dave Chesson’s course (that I started 8 months ago – that one was a freebie)
  • Read “Joy of Writing Sex”, “How to Write Science Fiction and Fantasy”, and at least two of the other four books on writing that I recently bought and have not read.
  • Go through the four courses I purchased on Udemy and have never taken and if they still apply, take them.
  • Return to my book writing

As I outlined my plan of action to my husband this morning, he had this to say:

This is what you do. You work like a madwoman on one task and are consumed with guilt over not doing the other thing, whatever that might be, while doing task one. It makes for a high level of dissatisfaction on a regular basis.

Well, yikes. When you say it like that…

Time Limit

I’m going to give it a month. The world will not fall apart if I stop for one month and get some learning done. Then, if it still feels appropriate, I’ll return to the production model – hopefully with a decent amount of knowledge under my belt.

Meanwhile…

I’m starting to receive the chapters of my books turned into audiobooks. It is a rather heady experience to hear someone else read something you have written. I can’t wait to share them with you!