So this morning I saw this offered for free…
And I immediately saw something like this, only full size…
Don’t freak out, I wouldn’t paint it quite that colorful!
So I showed it to my husband who promptly poo-poohed it.
And then I posted it on Facebook where someone else laughed, and another was like, “Don’t you have enough on your plate?”
And I simultaneously KNOW he is right and yet wrong at the same time.
You see, it is all a big huge Catch 22.
I want to write. Equally, I want folks to read what I have written.
But right there, in the middle of the room, is that nasty dose of reality. We cannot survive on one income alone. As much as I would like for it to happen, even if I were to stop spending every spare penny on renovating The Cottage, we still would be faced with only a pittance of savings, no health insurance for Em or me, and ZERO plan for retirement.
I have spent my entire adult life either putting out fires (metaphorically speaking), pulling money out of my ass (again, metaphorically), and running in circles trying desperately to find a place where I can stand steady and stop having to come up with money-making opportunities.
I want to stay home, homeschool the kiddo, write books and blog, and run a little Air B’nB paradise.
And I’ve got my husband, my eldest daughter, and good friends all saying the same thing – “You’re stressed, you have too much going on, you need to slow down/take one thing at a time.”
So I have this choice in front of me. I can keep cleaning toilets until i get too tired or my body breaks down. Or I can work my ass off, tear my hair out, and stress myself beyond measure for another year, possibly two…and possibly, just possibly run my little Air B’nB empire and no longer have to clean houses for a living.
It is a Catch 22 – stay the course, or pull back?
All I know is, I’ve got a book to edit, a cottage to renovate, a property that desperately needs a fence enclosing it (because yes, the local folks STILL walk through it), and a very full life.
Time to go strip some paint from doors in The Cottage.